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I was playing $10/$20 Stud at the casino the other day and a player comes to the table from a broken game and says some drunk stupid guy spilled his drink on the table and it ended the game, so that’s why she was playing with us. About an hour later a guy with a white bandage on his black and blued arm sits at the table and proceeds to spread out some rocks, some acorns and a couple of dried leaves along with about $700 in chips. So a player at the table asks, “Well I have to ask you an obvious question in front of everyone so you can just answer once…what happened to your arm?” I am a little more intrigued by the array of leaves, rocks, acorns and also thinking about getting all his chips. So the guy responds, “I attacked a car the other day and was pounding on the car, hurt myself, but you, oh you my friend would have killed the guy!” I’m thinking now that’s some good restraint there. I just had to say something, I said, “And all along I thought you might have tripped on some acorns…” A deadening silence looms over the table as we are all dealt our first three cards and our hero, we’ll call him “Acorn” is the forced bet and exclaims, “Raise!” a couple of players call, I fold as I usually do. The hand goes to showdown and on his last bet as the final caller is calling Acorn yells, “Goodbye!” and he wins the hand with some silly two pair, like deuces and treys. I am utterly confused and enthralled as I watch good players pick bad spots to challenge this guy and they start losing to him and each time he says, “Goodbye.” at the end of the hand. He also is saying re-raise every time he is the first bettor in the pot and as you know, you can’t re-raise if you are the first to bet. All the players are on tilt, it’s quite entertaining I might add. So I don’t know what comes over me but I pick up Split Queens and raise I get 1 caller and our buddy Acorn decides to limp raise his forced bet, so I raise again to $30 the caller drops and lo and behold Acorn says, “Cap!” But anyone who knows poker to some degree knows that heads up there is no cap so I slowly slide out another $20 without saying anything making it now a total of $50 before the 4th card. What am I psycho? I am thinking to myself. The dealer informs Acorn that it’s another $10 to call so he just calls. I very rarely go to $50 on three cards let alone Queens, but I guess I am just nuts. To make a long story short, I fire on every street and win the hand with just a pair of Queens and start singing a Beatles tune, “You say Goodbye, and I say Hello, Hello, Hello!” Acorn unaffected by this says, “Man, nice hand, what a horrible night I am having, I just came from another table and I spilt my drink on the table and it was a complete mess. Geesh!” My reply, “That couldn’t be you, the lady sitting in seat three said that it was some dumb drunk guy.” The deadening silence begins again and Acorn gathers up his leaves, acorns, rocks and about $400 less chips and says “Nice playing with you all, I just can’t seem to win tonight, it’s not my night.” A quick note, the next day Acorn sits down at the table next to me and raises the very first hand he plays and a talkative Jamaican Guy jokingly says, “That’s not very nice.” Acorn replies, “I do what I want, Shut Up!” This time I gathered up my chips and walked off. Two words come to my mind! “NUT JOB!”
Hope you enjoyed my story, Acorn is a really scary guy and by the way he now had a bandage on each arm.
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